R & R Hot Stove.... Marching On & Self Care

Good Monday Morning Everyone!  Oops!  I lie.  It is almost midnight on Monday evening.  Just returned from the big city and a visit to the APPLE Store to resurrect my computer and my iPhone.  Big Time Computer problems so a day late …and a dollar or two short to pay for the gas to travel anywhere these days!  However Tuesday is another good day to have a good day and it is supposed to rain.  Hoorah!  

It was another busy week in the lives of the authors of Gross Misconduct! Our Library session in Mayerthorpe drew approximately 30 people and it was wonderful to meet and talk with those who wanted to hear more of the story and have us sign their books.  Thanks to all who attended.  Not sure what happened at the Library in Whitecourt but I actually had a great conversation with Joseph the librarian as no one showed up!  I actually started to giggle inside as no one NO ONE entered the library to hear our story. Obviously THURSAY NIGHT WAS NOT A NIGHT TO HAVE A GOOD NIGHT!   Our Whitecourt Book Launches had caught all takers I guess and how could we compete with parents involved in baseball, soccer, hockey and a beautiful evening!    

We continue to seek out events to extend our message.  On July 9th you will find us at Summerfest in Sangudo and our books are now available not only in Whitecourt but at the Deep Creek Store in Sangudo, in Edson at Kwik Crests, Urban Image Spa and The Galloway Museum and in Drayton Valley at The Value Drug store as we continue to extend our reach. Books can also be ordered through Amazon, the Friesen Press bookstore. independent book stores will also order in the book for those interested.  Always looking for conferences, gatherings etc to bring Tracy’s courageous story into the hearts of more people in our attempt to change the world one reader at a time beginning with the person wearing your jeans and brushing your teeth and hopefully reading our book.   Please do not hesitate to share the story with another to expand our readership.  It is a hard read but, if we never fail to confront that which is very wrong in our society nothing changes.  Every voice matters as we bring family violence into our conversations in order to change what is not working in our society in regards to the safety of women and children and other vulnerable citizens.  Gross Misconduct Hitting From Behind is not simply a tragic story. It is also one of the great love, courage, resilience and healing. It is a Mother’s Love Story.
   
I always thought writing the book would be the most challenging part of this process but I have learned that there is so much more to such a venture than getting the words on the page.  Life still goes on in the midst of our focus on writing. And sometimes we need to recharge – or reground in the process.  We are both exhausted not only from the stress of writing but from the unknowns, the process of getting the book into the hands of readers and the adventures of everyday living with the book always in the back of our minds.  It is an exciting journey and filled with many incredible moments in the experiences we share in book and in our encounters with readers and potential readers.  It is also difficult when you meet people who report that although their children did not meet the same fate as Tracy’s boys they are living or have lived in fear or anguish for their children and themselves.  I look over and see my client comforting another woman who has arrived to have her book signed.  I speak to a young man in my line who tells me of the bullying he received not at school but in his own home.  Our book experiences are beautifully connecting but also filled sometimes with the trauma of other people’s experience and they resonate strongly with us and remind us of the importance of continuing to speak up about things that matter.  And to us we are doing just that.  It is so important that such continues but we also need to remind ourselves to ground ourselves in whatever way we can. I planted my garden... twice.  The first time my soaking seeds rotted waiting for me to find the time to plant and …nothing grew when I got those seeds in the ground.  I had waited too long. Instead I hope we are planting other seeds in our interactions with others – planting seeds of the importance of having conversations about the need for change in systems and attitudes that failed Tracy and her boys in her attempts to keep her boys safe.   The second time I planted my garden seeds again.  Three nights ago.  Bring on the rain!  

I know that we each need to practice self-care as we venture onward in our promoting the book and encouraging others to read it and  join us in confronting the culture of violence in our society. I know we also need to find balance and time for all those we love and care about.  

I have resumed my 30-30-30.  30 minutes of yoga, 30 minutes of meditation and 30 minutes of journaling each morning.  I had  bumped my personal self-care plan to the curb going to my computer chair rather than my yoga mat each morning    My goal now is restore the balance on this most incredible venture because…we are in it for the long term.  Perhaps this is simply a letter to myself! To remind me of the importance of my own personal self care in this most critical venture.  Hope you too are reading this Tracy Stark!  

The last few days I disconnected completely ‘divorcing’ my technology and my age old writing practice of always carrying a notebook. Part of that was because my phone and computer both cratered at the same time.  They were obviously  in cahoots with my higher self which was telling me to take a break! …A breath…or two.  So I completely unplugged.  Took to note paper to record my thoughts as we drove to Jasper to watch our granddaughter play soccer.  I worked hard to ground myself – feeling the support of the passenger seat in my Volvo as my husband drove attempting to be fully present to our beautiful drive.  Noticing.  Noticing the greenery, the cows and calves in the pastures, breathing in the beauty around me and remembering what I had done prior to being so very focused on our promotion of Gross Misconduct Hitting From Behind. When my mind began to return to the challenges ahead in our marketing plan I came back to my body and noticed what I was experiencing.  I had been telling everyone else to do exactly this for years and here in the now I had not been following my own advice!  I began noticing my breath, feeling my ‘butt’ on the seat of the car and reveling in being fully present to what I was experiencing on our drive.  

We did not turn on the radio nor listen to music although sometimes listening to or dancing to music can be a source of grounding as well. But today was not that day for me as I remembered the $229 ticket I received the day of our first book launch in Edmonton when I was so absorbed in singing Super Trooper by ABBA that I failed to realize my speed and soon found myself on the side of the road talking to a ‘Super Trooper sporting a car with a red and blue whirling light!  

However today I sensed into my body and the sensations I was noticing as I recognized how ‘offside’ I have been in our quest to market the book.  I practiced what I always teach!  I went into my five senses and asked myself.  What do I feel?  What can I smell, taste, hear, feel and see – right here.  Right now.  It was a great day to have a great day!  And I …almost slept through the night.  What a gift I gave myself and my friends and family by being…fully present.  Have a great week everyone – one moment at a time!  It is quite a lovely experience!

                                                                                                                              Love Sandra​