THE R & R HOT STOVE - Media Day

Good Monday Morning Everyone

TODAY IS A GOOD DAY TO HAVE A GOOD DAY!

    The past week has again been filled will many incredible moments. Interviews at Global Edmonton News with Sara Ryan, CBC Edmonton TV interview with Nancy Carlson and CBC Edmonton Radio’s meeting with Rod Kurtz who were all great hosts with wonderful teams who provided us opportunities to speak about the book.  Speaking is my “game” and I cannot believe how nervous I am when in front of the cameras or answering questions on the radio!  I have been so focused on writing the book the last three years and now it is out there and doing so well it is almost overwhelming as we attempt to bring awareness to our readers with the rest of the R & R story. My heart is continuing to race as I join Tracy on the high stools opposite Nancy Carlson our beautiful host for our CBC Edmonton TV interview.

    Tracy who has continually told me she is terrified of public speaking has been rocking all these interviews interspersed with a few tears as she has recounted her heartbreaking story. Today I am  there to be her support but honestly… I am a mess!  She is perched on a stool in the studio looking like a Vogue model when I finally arrive to sit beside her. My heart is racing as I take my seat.  

    Of course, it did not help that when we arrive at the CBC Offices I cannot find my Vaccination Passport required to enter.  Tracy tries to help me locate the document on my phone. I have no recollection of where it is.  No clue.  Haven’t used it since the beginning of March! I tell her I will phone my daughter Kristin and to go ahead to the interview.  I can’t even remember my last name at this point as I am unbelievably stressed.  Tracy has to leave as our hosts are waiting for us upstairs.   I watch Tracy as she waves good bye to me with a big smile, wishing me luck in finding the Passport.  She enters the elevator to head to the interview. I feel totally abandoned! I have travelled to Edmonton for the interview and now I won’t even make it into the studio.  I remind myself that maybe that is a good thing!   

    Then, with pounding heart, I call Kristin, one of my three daughters who take turns giving me ‘tips’ about organizing my life, to see if she could remember where the darn document is on my phone.  No answer.  My blood pressure is rising by the second. I call again. She is at the Dance Festival in St Albert braiding the hair of one of my granddaughters for the next performance.  She drops the three strands upon receiving my emergency 911 call and rushes in to rescue mode to save her mother!  Thank God for her memory of where she had pinned my document in her phone.  She texts it to me.  I display the code to the fellow at the desk.   SUCCESS!  I race into the elevator.  I can’t remember which  floor where I am to go to!  There are only three for god sakes.  I take a chance and push 3.  I remind myself “I am the therapist! Tracy needs me to keep her calm!” I breathe so deeply for two of the three floors and then at the third exit the elevator, heart still racing but so calm…. On the outside.  My distress hardly noticeable to my wonderful hosts who greet the “late” therapist with beautiful smiles. I remove my hat.  Donna, our marketing guru, has warned me it might cause a shadow.  My hair is a mess!  I can’t find my comb in my purse.  I know it is in there somewhere but…..  
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    Nancy rushes me to her dressing room and loans me a comb and assured me her entire make up kit is mine if I need it.  Now that is very special. In the presence of another beautiful model!  Nancy helps flip my hair into place.  I template off her cool and composed manner.  I return to the lights and take my seat beside Tracy searching for a degree of serenity. It has to be here somewhere!  She smiles warmly at me.  My mouth is dry.  I am far from peaceful on the inside. I need water.  What if I start to choke and can’t speak??  The camera man obliges before he wires me up. Nancy is extremely patient and cordial. Thank god I am wearing black and they can’t see my heart beating out of my chest which they might if I were in white …although they might still hear my old ticker thumping loudly as I do.  

    The questions begin. I continue to breathe and feel the support of my stool. I am the therapist. I need to be the calm one. I am actually shaking!  Sitting next to me…… is my client speaking with such composure and gradually calming me down with her poise and her ability to hit the high points of the “whys” of why we were writing the book.  She keys in on the systems that failed her.  She speaks of the many Court Orders she had in place -written and paid for - but not enforced.  The lack of support at wanting to remove the boys from the home of her ex-husband after a series of incidents that led her to believe the boys were in trouble. The cry for help directed at the RCMP who told her they could not touch her ex-husband because he was the biological father.  I feel my body settling. Tracy glances over at me and nods. My first line centre is passing me the puck. I breathe in.  I am ready. I have regained my ground. I begin to speak of Tracy’s greatest desire of having the short lives of the boys to make a significant difference in the lives of other children. What a great pass! Right on the tape! The interview is on and I’m in it!  Thanks “McTracy!”  

Until next Monday!

Love Sandra